Ladies, Got A Decreasing Sex Drive? Get That Orgasm Back!

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Orgasm – CC Image from Matt Jiggins on Flickr

Don’t be embarrassed, a decreasing sex drive happens to us all. You just don’t fancy it, or you struggle with reaching orgasm. It’s more widespread than you think. Even if it’s a long-term problem, rather than a short-term reaction to a passing stress or illness, there are still some ways you might be able to buck things up. Here are some tips to help you reach orgasm, and improve that decreasing sex drive! First up is lubrication.

Lubricate A Decreasing Sex Drive Off The Planet

A decreasing sex drive can be due to vaginal dryness. If you’re drier than a Texan drought, orgasms are hard to come by. Sex hurts unless it’s slippery, and unless you have a special fantasy, that’s not going to help. If you aren’t producing any lubrication of your own, cheat with a good quality lubricant. You might get addicted to it, so buy plenty!

Keep an eye out for lubricants that have the added bonus of boosting libido. Lotions such as HerSolution Gel may help a decreasing sex drive. They utilise a range of herbs and stimulants, which they claim dilates blood vessels, and increases blood-flow to the vagina.

You’re really going to struggle with orgasm if there’s no lubrication, so get this sorted out first. Once you are happy things are sliding along nicely, it’s time to concentrate on the big O.

1. Don’t skip the foreplay.

When women are pounced upon and expected to climax, they may as well collect their coat and wave goodbye to that orgasm. To get there, you’ll need some foreplay. Consider it a warm up to the games. If you are lucky, you may even orgasm during foreplay.

It can be easier for some women to orgasm then, because attention is paid to the clitoris. They aren’t worrying about a partner getting there first and leaving them high and dry. You’ll need time for foreplay, but it’s time well-spent. Once you’ve orgasmed, you’ll know you can do it, and subsequent sex will be better.

Find out if you prefer light pressure or firm pressure. Do you prefer it slow or fast? We can’t tell what’s best for you we’re afraid, you’ll have to do some work. Start out on your own if you feel the need to perform for your partner. Above all – relax. Just like you can never think of the right word when you wrack your brain, if you try hard to orgasm, it won’t come (pun-fun!).

Make sure there are no pressures; even knowing you have to get up early can leave you frustrated. It could be that your decreasing sex drive is due to never having the time for sex – use it or lose it certainly applies here.

Once you get back into the swing of sex, you might find that your libido increases. Starting is always the hard part.

2. Understanding what is where.

You need to know your own body if you want to make it work for you. If you don’t really know what your clitoris is capable of, then find out! Look for your G-spot too. Try a few inches inside your vagina, just up at the front. Play around until you find out what you like. Use some toys too if it makes things easier.

Don’t forget that erogenous zones are all over the body. Your neck, feet, scalp, ears – test them all out. Some exploration of your sexual self might perk up a decreasing sex drive. You might think that sexual exploration is for teenagers, but that’s not the case.

People get bored. Sadly that’s a fact of life. A decreasing sex drive might reflect your indifference to a partner’s charms and efforts. Something new may well ignite your enthusiasm and boost your libido sky-high.

3. Tell your partner what to do – We don’t mean the washing-up.

Although some women can have multiple orgasms, men have it easier when it to comes to getting there – physically speaking that is. All men’s bits are on the outside, within easy reach. The clitoris, that magic climax button, is hidden away. It feels like some kind of cosmic practical joke. Yes, it looks all nice and tidy, but when it comes to access, it can be easier to find an anaemic snowman in Iceland.

You don’t need to bark out ‘that’s wrong’ to your partner, but if he’s at the North Pole, and you want the South Pole, then guide him there. Plenty of encouragement and saying what’s good is an enjoyable learning curve for both of you.

Unfortunately, school sex education classes don’t tell us much about the clitoris. ‘The vagina is the resting place for the penis.’ does not help women orgasm, and it certainly doesn’t re-stimulate a decreasing sex drive! It’s your job to educate now.

It’ll be the best biology lesson you’ve ever had.

Will Supplements Help A Decreasing Sex Drive?

Sexual supplements may potentially help you with a decreasing sex drive. Most supplements claim to increase libido by boosting estrogen levels, and by increasing blood circulation to the vagina. Tablet supplements may restore some oomph to your personal life if taken on a consistent daily basis.

Provestra, for example, recommend that you use their supplement for thirty days before expecting results. Creams and gels like Vigorelle may work immediately, but last a shorter time. Take supplements with caution, especially if you need other prescription medicines. A decreasing sex drive can be thoroughly depressing.

If you aren’t already stressed and worrying enough, your sex life is going to seed as well. Don’t let it get on top of you. Sexual health is important, and a decreasing sex drive is a medical complaint that your doctor will take note of. Help yourself as much as you can, and don’t give yourself a hard time.

Certainly don’t take the blame for a decreasing sex drive from anyone else. Your hormones, lifestyle and health are not always down to your choice or mismanagement. Just do the best you can to increase your chances of a great sex life. You’ll be a happier person, and in the meantime, we’ll try to get a diagram of the clitoris onto the sex education syllabus.

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