The Foundations of Ejaculatory Control (Answer to a Reader)

A few days ago I received an email from a reader – let’s call him Mike – which asked for a piece of advice about his premature ejaculation.

Mike gave me permission to publish his email in order to help the smart community at LetsTalkSex.net to get permanent control of their ejaculation and give amazing intercourse sex to their partners.

Here’s a simplified version of the email:

I’m 32 and lately I’ve been experiencing some severe premature ejaculation, coming within seconds from penetration… A few weeks ago she talked about breaking up and I became even more nervous and anxious… I think the problem is my mind but I don’t know…
Could you give me some quick tips?

Ask yourself a question.

What do you want?

Do you want to escape your problem and use a quick fix technique like counting the thrusts, squeezing the top of the penis or distracting yourself?

Or do you want to solve this premature ejaculation permanently so that for the rest of your life you can please your woman and give her mind-blowing orgasms with pure intercourse sex?

The choice is all yours.

I’m going to assume that you’re smart enough to opt for a permanent solution.

Now, I understand you’re anxious, and you understand that this anxiety doesn’t help you. People that have never had P.E. would tell you:

“Try to be calm man” or “relax buddy, be in control” but if you wanted to hear those words you would have asked for help in a pub and not to me.

Everyone tells you to be in control, but no one ever tells you how to be in control. Did you notice that?

Now, in your situation I want you to gain control and confidence indirectly as a consequence of your results in the physical world. Practice the exercise I’m about to give you and when your mind will start noticing your improvements you’ll instinctively start feeling more empowered.

Let’s start from the very foundations.

You need to become aware of your current PONR (point of no return) or arousal limit.

I’m sure you don’t know what your current limit is and this is why you feel frustrated, you think ejaculation is something that “happens to you”, but you’ll soon realize that ejaculation is actually something “you do”.

One simple way to become aware of your PONR (point of no return) is through the practice of Edging: an exercise where you masturbate and stop when you feel like you are close to the PONR (the point when if you keep stimulating you are going to come).

When you stop, use that time to feel the sensations in your body (especially in the area between your scrotum and your anus and on top of your penis near the base) and to take deep breaths.

Let the arousal subside a bit and when the urge of coming is gone, start again. A session should be at least 20 minutes long.

Practice edging for at least a couple of weeks (one training session every other day). Allow yourself to ejaculate every three sessions and not more than that.

Very important: become aware of how your PONR feels like, don’t listen to people who tell you to distract yourself, that’s the same people who would tell you to watch TV or get drunk when you have a problem.

I’ll never tell you to run away from your problems or from your sensations of arousal, but I’ll always tell you to face your sensations and take control of your arousal once and for all.

I won’t be surprised when I’ll discover that most of the people that spread this idea of avoiding to feel your arousal and think of something ugly to distract yourself during sex are in the erectile dysfunction industry and working to create more future customers for themselves (yes, distracting yourself will give you erection problems in the future).

So, practice this basic/beginner Edging for a couple of weeks, let me know how you go and I’ll give you more advanced types of edging for you to practice in order to build up resistance in your body and push back your ejaculatory threshold. Or if you want an even better piece of advice and want to give your girl a mind blowing, long intercourse and beat premature ejaculation permanently, simply follow my step by step program LTS University, which will take you to quickly and naturally master ejaculation once and for all (90% of my subscribers already have a copy!).

Let me know how it goes.

Join LTS University – Become a Sex God

About Deon Black

In the past 11 years, Deon has helped tens of millions of people around the world through his sex toy reviews and guides. Since 2012, he and his team have spent over 60,000 hours testing more than 1000 sex toys. His work & advice has appeared on websites like: Insider, Healthline, MensHealth, Wikipedia, Yahoo, Cosmopolitan, Romper, WomensHealth and more. Learn more.